I used to sleep when I was younger...

I used to sleep when I was younger. It's crazy how I hardly sleep at all now. I'm sitting here at 435 in the morning tryna find a motive. Trying to think and see what I've been missing. What's eating my sleep. Not money...I got that. Not family...I love mine. Not friends...I have the best of those. Could it be a female I'm missing??? That was my first guess but then I got 3 texts from 3 girls that made me realize that's not it at all. I often tell young ladies, "I don't sleep good alone", when I stay over to make them feel special. But the truth is...I'm up all night either way. You give me NO COMFORT whatsoever...oh shout out to HER by the way. My only guess would be I don't sleep because...well...my foolish pride. I'm afraid the world will do just fine while I'm dormant. Maybe I'm NOT that important. But if I don't sleep, I'll never have to face that reality. Before I can sleep I ask myself a million and one questions. What could I be doing instead? what am I going to miss? who's gonna need me? when I wake up am I just supposed to pick up from where I ended yesterday? or is sleep like a reset button where you start over again from the top? The little sleep I get is because I'd die without it...not because I'm dying to get it. Maybe there's really something behind this...or maybe I'm just rambling because it's 5 in the morning and I need some sleep...